The Greatest Love Of All Is Yourself
A Gift, A Hope & A Goal
I wrote this as Prayer for everyone’s own self-love
Sit in front of a mirror and read it to yourself, for yourself
I believe, that for me to survive, my future must be based on true self love, and inner acceptance, of myself, and of others. I understand that the love I am seeking is not a self absorbed love filled with vanities and obsessions about my looks, age or social position. I know the love I am seeking is the accepting love within myself. A love that is far beyond the dogma of religion or the love that is seen in romance novels, hollywood movies or poems.
Yes, I now know, the true inner love that I seek is based on my subtle awareness, my gentle intuitiveness and my unbreakable resolve to feel this for myself and share this understanding with others. Therefore, I speak to myself, of a love that has the ability to give, as much as it takes, listens through the heart, as much as it speaks through the mind, a love that can endure the hardships of day to day living, and a love that contains the real value, and substance, of what we are as humans: vessels of Divine Love and Understanding.
I know that often I speak of my belief in peace, the glory of self and global love, and the light and depth of human understanding. But more so, I understand that it’s within the loving consistent actions of myself, not only my feelings and words, that transform my life into a beautiful experience and allows me to evolve into the person I was truly born to be.
I also know the love within my mind, body and soul ALL needs to be ONE. I know I often speak about the depths of my compassion for life, and the empathy of myself and others. Yet I know that I too often don’t allow that understanding to penetrate myself, or those around me, on a day-to-day living reality. I now understand that it’s when things get tough, when the tests of life come, that, that shows me who I truly am and what I truly believe in. I realize FAR TOO OFTEN my words don’t match my thoughts and my thoughts don’t match my actions. I say one thing and do another, too often without even realizing it. I must realize, real love, true love, isn’t something to put up on a shelf and take down when I feel like it. Real love, true love, is about acting in accordance to my words and beliefs WHEN I DON’T FEEL LIKE IT. That’s when it counts most, giving help when I don’t have to, lending a hand even when I’m tired, listening to someone from the heart instead of just wanting them to finish speaking so I can do something else that I want to do. Love is not always comfortable and easy, more than not, love challenges me to be more than I am, to grow beyond my comfortable existence and to see beyond the surface of what “looks good” and “feels good”. Real love, contains the elements of trust, acceptance, integrity, endurance and a host of other attributes that make my life, and all life, stable and worth fighting for. Love is worth fighting for because “there’s some good in this world and it’s worth fighting for.”
I know that the love I with hold from myself, and others, more than anything else, causes the pain I feel, the sorrow I experience and the loneliness I feel within myself, a loneliness felt even when I am in a room surrounded with others. I am becoming afraid of myself, and afraid of the pain I cause to others. So I end up holding back my love and not trusting the love of others because “I got hurt before” or “I don’t have the time” or “I don’t want to get hurt again” or “I can’t trust you”, etc. Whatever my excuses I end up having a trail of broken hearts in my life, with none more broken than my own.
I therefore must learn to let go of my fear and not let the hurts of my past define my love of who I want to be today. I must learn to love the self again because “learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all.”
If I could love again
without the fear or the pain
so much of this life and world
I would reclaim
If I could love the self again
and let go of the my inner fear
so much of this worlds heart
I would repair
If I could love just for love
and hold life in heart and hand
I would have the courage
to live the love I understand
I know I have the courage
to live the love
Eric Sander Kingston